Building self-esteem right from the time he or she is conceived, say experts.
A positive self-image is a basic ingredient for a happy, successful and confident life. Our self-image dictates how we react emotionally, socially and spiritually to the different situations and people in our lives. Though most parents know that a positive self-image is an important part of the growth process, very few make a conscious effort to inculcate the same in their children.
It's only words
"The quickest way to make someone feel special is with loving and encouraging words. During the Panchatantra Era, women would speak positive words of success, triumph and achievements, even to their unborn children in their wombs. I guess that's why we had such scholars in that era. Positive words to a child shape his future, confidence and self-worth," says singer, actor and now a budding motivational speaker, Raageshwari Loomba.
EQ is a key factor
A positive self-image leads to self-esteem, which is a must to achieve success. It is a key ingredient for happiness, which develops into a formidable weapon later in life, helping us deal effectively with its ups and downs. "Today, besides a child's intelligence quotient, we also talk about his or her emotional quotient. To develop a positive self-image, a child needs to feel good about himself or herself and feel successful," says Dr Kersi Chawda, psychiatrist.
Let your child be
Dr Harish Shetty, psychiatrist, says, "For a child to develop a positive self-image, the most important thing for parents to do is to just let them be! Parents need to understand that 'being' is more important than 'doing'. Respect and trust are very important in life. You should speak to your child on an equal level, and never make him or her feel that he or she is alone."
Praise your child
Doctors believe that a positive self-image can go a long way in reinforcing a child's attitude towards life. "Developing a child's positive self-image can be done at home as well as in school, but at home, it is more important and easily done because the child spends most of his/her time there. There is actually no limit to praising your child. You should encourage him/her for every little thing," adds Chawda.
Accept your child
Raageshwari says, "Let me give you an example of a rich child and a poor child. A poor child, by the age of two, lags behind a rich kid vis-a-vis his or her ability to talk and understand. The gap widens by high school and by college, it's a gulf, because the poor kid never hears words like success, money and power. But the tides turn where compassion is concerned. The poor kid is more mature and considerate, while the rich kid lags behind where empathy is concerned, because he never heard those words consistently."
A child begins forming a self-image right from the time he/she is conceived, says Dr Shetty. "Your child should be accepted as he or she is, and not as you would want him or her to be. This is key to letting the child develop a positive self-image," he concludes.
Words can change your life
When we affirm to our child, 'You are a scholar', there is a chemical change in his body that will draw him to scholarly habits. A boss patting your back saying, 'You are a genius in your work', instantly makes you sit up and work diligently. A positive word can change our day and change our child's life. Go and say a positive word right now, " says Raageshwari Loomba.
Help your child develop a positive self-image
Tell your children that you love them. They love to hear that, always.
Stop trying to mould your child into what you want him/her to be. Instead, accept your child as he or she is.
Listen to what your child is saying. With interest. Never ask your child to "shut up", while she/he is narrating an incident.
Let your child know that everyone is blessed with certain talents and he/she would one day discover it.
Your child should know that perfection is not in the way you look, but it lies in the way you utilise your special talents.
Teach your child to focus on his/her strength and develop it.
Teach them to love and respect others.
Children feel positive if they know that their parents are there for them. Do not snub your child saying you are too busy.
Be polite to your child.
Allow your child to take simple decisions and then help and guide them through it. Give them space and respect their decisions.
Teach your child that nothing is really prefect. Make your child understand that mistakes and failure are a part of life.
Always give credit for their efforts, for it will lead them to pursue higher things
.